Carpe Aeternum

Finding the Eternal in the Every Day

Brad Bellmore Gets a Life – 4

I recently heard a pastor make the case for fear being the greatest sin we can commit. His reasoning basically went this way. He felt that fear was the opposite of love, that it drives us away from others and from God, preventing us to take the risks of faith, hope and loving others. Therefore, since loving God and loving others are the two greatest commandments, then the thing that prevented that the most proved the worst sin.
I don’t know that I agree with him fully, but I agree with it enough to comment on it here and let it shape my quest to live. When I look at my kids, the thing that bothers me the most is when I see them act out of fear. I hate when they do that. I don’t want them to create a pattern of letting fear make the decisions in their lives. Sometimes they are scared by something that should scare them, something that is threatening or surprising. Those things are easy to recover from. A car racing by too close to the curb is a real threat and elicits real fear. But some comfort and reassurances that they are ok allows them to move on. But the moments when they pull back from trying something because they fear that they might fail or what others might think of them – that’s the stuff that drives me nuts.
I want them to know that can fail as freely and as frequently as they want and that I’ll still love them. I may get frustrated if they don’t learn how to adapt and overcome, but I’ll not stop loving them. And I’d rather have them try and fail than never try at all. I want them to know freedom. I want them to be capable of taking big risks.
I know, somewhere in my heart that God feels that way about me. He wants me to live and to love and to be free. He wants me to taste life and enjoy it. He wants me to be bold and not worry about what others think. He wants me to be myself as fully as I can. And every time that I let fear kick me in the balls and abdicate my freedom, God gets pissed. Not a hate me and will never talk to me again pissed, but I’m sure there is a deep growl in the back of his throat. I can here they thought of “don’t let fear do that to you.”
I’m pretty sure God wants us to turn the tables and kick fear in the balls.

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One thought on “Brad Bellmore Gets a Life – 4

  1. Brad, I believe the best antidote to fear is not love but rather faith in God. Fear is the anticipation that something bad is happening or is about to happen, and this affects our nervous system and our stream of consciousness in a negative way. When you replace your fear with faith, you take the “leap of faith” and jump to the assumption that, no matter what is happening or what is about to happen next, God is behind it, and therefore it will ultimately result in some greater good, be it personal or spiritual growth or some kind of contribution to humanity, etc. For example, a dreaded illness can ultimately result in self-healing through spiritual growth. Holding your belief and faith in the ultimate goodness of all things, your body can relax and you will have the ability to develop the attitude of courage, knowing that God is there, still being mindful of difficulties and challenges in life, and knowing that your faith in the goodness of God’s plan for you will help you get through it. Then engage with your challenges with an attitude of courage and a determination to find the goodness behind the struggle.

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